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Lunchboxing.com Presents There is a place I know. Perhaps you have heard of it. It is a place of great mystery and unparalleled beauty. It is a place of passion and glamour, of crime and suspense, of love and tragedy, of joy and pain. I invite you to join me on a journey to a place called Boneton, Alaska. bullied by Jason Betrue on 3/7/2003 :: Thursday Afternoon Tomfoolery  You are probably saying to yourself "Gee, I wonder why I am looking at a poorly photoshopped picture of Fisher Stevens on a Ferrari Testarossa?" Well, maybe what you should really be asking yourself is "Why wouldn't I be looking at a poorly photoshopped picture of Fisher Stevens on a Ferrari Testarossa? See what I am saying? Now that we have that behind us, let's discuss today's featured entertainment. Paws O'Henry has put together a self-referential piece entitled The World Agrees: Lunchboxing is [Cold Getting] Retarded! . And by gosh it's true, as evidenced by the above picture of Fisher Stevens on a Ferrari Testarossa. If you haven't seen that yet, you should check it out. It's right there, above this text. Then, read what the world has to say about lunchboxing. Then, go to sleep. It's late and you have a big day ahead of you! bullied by jamie flam on 3/6/2003 :: Dirty Kiley  OK...Hands down worst photoshop feature picture ever constructed. But if you can find a better way to promote two brand new reviews, one for Dirty's new album "Keep It Pimp & Gangsta" and one for Rilo Kiley's recent performance at The Knitting Factory in NYC, then by all means, send it along. Making the situation even tougher is the fact that one of the reviews is kinda realish, and the other kinda fakish. I will let you figure it out for yourselves. Also, chances are you aren't too familiar with either of the featured bands. This will make their reviews all the more exciting. Their monumentally different sounds and fan bases also make thier photoshop union all the more random and beautiful. Please note that the Rilo Kiley feature was written by Erin Fitzgerald, our newest and most exciting contributor ever. The Dirty review was written byJeff Berson, a lunchboxing veteran who is holding it down as the second most exciting contributor ever. bullied by jamie flam on 3/5/2003 :: Something to Beatty Off To  Warren Beatty loooooves sex. This is the absolute truth. In fact, he loves sex so much that he will even have sex with inanimate objects. We know because we have access to top secret files. SUPER top secret. So top secret in fact, that in the previous sentence I used the word "super" in ALL CAPITALS. Just like that. Anyhoo, in these files we found pictures. Pictures of things that contained even smaller pictures of Warrren Beatty, smiling. We can only assume that this means he wants to have sex with objects in these pictures. Click here and decide for yourself: SUPER sleazeball, or SUPER SUPER sleazeball?!?!?! *Note: Beatty is not relevant to any recent news or entertainment stories. None that we know of anyways. bullied by jamie flam on 3/4/2003 :: How Much Is That Doggie in the Tote Bag???  I figure why not post an amusing picture that has neither relevant text nor a link of any kind to accompany it. It is no crime. But seriously, I think we can all agree that this image reasonably depicts some of the many ways to use a dog. They can fill a nylon bag. ; ) They can be models for cheap luggage. = ) They can break in a hat nicely. :-O bullied by Quarterbar on 3/4/2003 ::  Least Successful Excuses by People Accused of Crimes by paws o'henry 1. Yes, but as I said, it was "Opposite Day." 2. If it's that illegal Gil Gerard shouldn't glamorize it. 3. So all of the sudden I look up and there's these towers where the runway should be. 4. He kept quoting Office Space. 5. At that point I was more concerned with saving my family than with not sodomizing anyone. 6. OK, then where was the "no murdering" sign? 7. With all due respect, I just don't think you're racist enough to understand. 8. But who's ever heard of a molesting priest? 9. With thousands of first-degree murders everyday I'm a little surprised you would go to this much trouble over a second-degree murder. 10. I'll agree to explain when you agree to the tickle game. 11. We had the venue's permission to use pyrotechnics. 12. Cancer kills more people in one day than I killed in three. Yet I don't see anyone arresting cancer. 13. The old nipple belt didn't match my shoes. 14. I'll put the system on trial! bullied by jamie flam on 3/3/2003 :: |
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